I have a problem. I am a fixer. It has less to do with a desire to help and more to do with a misguided sense of responsibility. There is no real sense of proportion that comes with this condition, just an unrealistic idea that it is my responsibility to fix it, whatever it may be. I seldom ask for help, usually because I feel that I am a bother to others, and sometimes for fear that I will only be disappointed.
The real trouble comes when I finally discover that I can't fix it; then I shut down. I begin to ignore the warning signs that I am doing more harm than good to those around me. Instead of simply asking what others need of me, I assume that my inability to fix everything is a failure, and I allow the weight of that failure to eclipse my perception of others and the situation. It is a sickness really. A lie that my mind has somehow learned to believe.
I do believe that I have, to some degree, known this about myself for quite some time, but the reaction of any fixer to any problem is to try and fix it yourself. That, obviously is not only incredibly frustrating, but entirely impossible. The whole reason that this world needed a savior is because God knew that we are all ill-equip to save ourselves, or each other for that matter. No matter how much spiritual iron I pump my muscles could never reach that capacity. So, I am enlisting the help of saints like you, to help me entreat the most powerful source I know. Not only for myself, but for anyone who reads this list of symptoms and sees their own condition being revealed, let us pray together for the yoke to be broken.
Gracious Heavenly Father, we come before you humbly today, acknowledging that we need to be healed of the condition called fixer,and let it be replaced with the position You gave us as helpers. Lord Jesus, we know that we are hurting the very people you have called us to help by trying to take Your place as savior. Please help us to learn that helping is different than taking on a whole problem by ourselves, please teach us the difference, and show us how and who to ask for help. Deliver us from this false sense of responsibility. Teach us wisdom and balance. In Your son's precious name, Jesus, we pray,
Amen
Jesus Girl: a blog by Ina Williams
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
Afraid to Believe
2 Kings 4:8-37
I was reading the story of the wealthy woman who made a room in her house for Elisha. Out of gratitude he asked what he could do for her in return. Gracious host that she is, she insists that she needs nothing, but the persistent Elisha asks a servant "What can be done for her?" (v14), and the servant informs him that she has no son. So, Elisha calls her to him and tells her that the following year she will have a son. Her reaction: "No my Lord...don't mislead your servant..."
Poor woman of God! She has learned to embrace Phil 4:11 ("...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.") so well that she forgot how to hope. Even with the blessing staring her right in the face all she could think of was it being snatched away, indeed later it even seemed to be (v20) when her son died. But, what she and I forget is that we serve a God who restores. Dreams, hearts, families, careers, finances, and lives (see v 35); trust that if He blessed you with it He will surely care, tend and restore it.
So the next time the man/woman of God stares into your eyes and speaks hope into your life receive it with every ounce of courage you have, and know that if He said it, its already done.
Amen
I was reading the story of the wealthy woman who made a room in her house for Elisha. Out of gratitude he asked what he could do for her in return. Gracious host that she is, she insists that she needs nothing, but the persistent Elisha asks a servant "What can be done for her?" (v14), and the servant informs him that she has no son. So, Elisha calls her to him and tells her that the following year she will have a son. Her reaction: "No my Lord...don't mislead your servant..."
Poor woman of God! She has learned to embrace Phil 4:11 ("...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.") so well that she forgot how to hope. Even with the blessing staring her right in the face all she could think of was it being snatched away, indeed later it even seemed to be (v20) when her son died. But, what she and I forget is that we serve a God who restores. Dreams, hearts, families, careers, finances, and lives (see v 35); trust that if He blessed you with it He will surely care, tend and restore it.
So the next time the man/woman of God stares into your eyes and speaks hope into your life receive it with every ounce of courage you have, and know that if He said it, its already done.
Amen
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Happy Birthday America!
I woke up this morning and one of the first things on my heart to pray about was this country, and the beautiful people who inhabit it. First,I must say that I am so grateful to each and every man and woman fighting the battles that we cannot in our armed forces. Whether army, military, navy or the countless other officers who protect us in ways that we can not see or understand. Thank you!
I know that we have a tendency as Americans to utilize our right of free speech frequently to complain about all the controversy that is America; but I have to say that of all the flaws that this country, like every country, has I am so immensely proud to be a citizen of this one. Of course we're not perfect. If all the work was done there would be no point of waking up tomorrow, but there is nothing in the Declaration of Independence about the promise of happiness, but rather the pursuit; which, if we're honest is the best part. The pursuit is what strengthens and prepares you for the eventual acceptance. There is no point in receiving a gift that you have no idea how to use.
America, at it's idealistic root, is about the freedom of each individual man and woman to better the world in their own way, it is about having the right to create positive change. Are you using your right?
I know that there are a million things that still need work in this country, and the world at large, but let's take today to celebrate all of the past victories, reflect on the present ones, and plan for those of the future.
There is so much to be grateful for, pick a few and shoot some fireworks for them.
Love!
Ina
I know that we have a tendency as Americans to utilize our right of free speech frequently to complain about all the controversy that is America; but I have to say that of all the flaws that this country, like every country, has I am so immensely proud to be a citizen of this one. Of course we're not perfect. If all the work was done there would be no point of waking up tomorrow, but there is nothing in the Declaration of Independence about the promise of happiness, but rather the pursuit; which, if we're honest is the best part. The pursuit is what strengthens and prepares you for the eventual acceptance. There is no point in receiving a gift that you have no idea how to use.
America, at it's idealistic root, is about the freedom of each individual man and woman to better the world in their own way, it is about having the right to create positive change. Are you using your right?
I know that there are a million things that still need work in this country, and the world at large, but let's take today to celebrate all of the past victories, reflect on the present ones, and plan for those of the future.
There is so much to be grateful for, pick a few and shoot some fireworks for them.
Love!
Ina
Friday, July 2, 2010
A Christian, Out Loud
It's kind of like praying silently, it isn't an invalid prayer God still hears and honors a silent prayer, but there is something so powerful about a word, or a life, spoken out loud. A Christian life out loud declares love through faith in three ways; one, love for Christ to Christ; two, love for Christ to the world; and three, love for Christ to your fear.
Love for Christ to Christ. It is the difference between whispering I love you and yelling it. Now, there is a time and place for both. A whispered declaration of adoration can be extremely potent, and I believe that that is what our worship and personal relationship and devotion to Jesus is for. But imagine whispering I love you in a crowded mall or at a carnival. There is so much going on that your sentiments simply become apart of the noise. So it is with our lives. I believe that the hustle and bustle of our own lives sometimes drowns out our quiet murmurs of affection. If we want God to be confident in our love for Him, sometimes it requires a bigger gesture than what we are used to. It is not about earning His love, we could never earn it, and why try when He assured us that we already have it anyway. It is simply about showing Him how much we love Him.
Love for Christ to the world. I cannot count the number of times I have heard someone say that their main reservation about religion is the people who participate. If there is seemingly no difference between Christians and the rest of the world morally or otherwise, then there is absolutely no reason for someone to believe that they should become a Christian.
If we are God's hands and feet, then what are we doing to help and heal the world? How are we benefiting the souls that we are trying to save? It is not just a school of thought that we want to share with others, it is a lifestyle. Are you modeling it?
Love for Christ to our fears. I agree with my mentor Ricky Temple who said that satan doesn't have to do much. Most of the time he just plants the seed and lets us do the rest. To that end I think that fear is our second worst enemy. Fear of being alone, or unwanted, of doing to much, or not enough. The list goes on and on until one day you realize you have talked yourself out of every great opportunity, simply because you were afraid.
But, a love out loud to Christ makes me think of when I was younger. There was a really dark and cold hallway downstairs in our house. Our family room (aka my playroom) was on the other side. It was one of my favorite rooms in the house, but of course in order to get to it I had to walk through this terrifying hallway. The light switch was on the other end near the playroom, so I had to walk through the darkness to get to both. I have always had an active imagination, so my mind was full of invisible creatures and spirits that might be lurking and waiting to attack. One day, I decided to try something to silence them, I stood at the edge of the hallway and spoke out loud to the darkness. It may sound silly, but it really helped, and the fact that it made me feel better gave me even more confidence. Now don't get me wrong I still walked pretty briskly down the hallway, but I wasn't paralyzed by my fear. That is what faith out loud does, it empowers you to walk through the darkest places knowing that you will never walk alone. God was with me in my hallway, and He will be with you in yours.
Love for Christ to Christ. It is the difference between whispering I love you and yelling it. Now, there is a time and place for both. A whispered declaration of adoration can be extremely potent, and I believe that that is what our worship and personal relationship and devotion to Jesus is for. But imagine whispering I love you in a crowded mall or at a carnival. There is so much going on that your sentiments simply become apart of the noise. So it is with our lives. I believe that the hustle and bustle of our own lives sometimes drowns out our quiet murmurs of affection. If we want God to be confident in our love for Him, sometimes it requires a bigger gesture than what we are used to. It is not about earning His love, we could never earn it, and why try when He assured us that we already have it anyway. It is simply about showing Him how much we love Him.
Love for Christ to the world. I cannot count the number of times I have heard someone say that their main reservation about religion is the people who participate. If there is seemingly no difference between Christians and the rest of the world morally or otherwise, then there is absolutely no reason for someone to believe that they should become a Christian.
If we are God's hands and feet, then what are we doing to help and heal the world? How are we benefiting the souls that we are trying to save? It is not just a school of thought that we want to share with others, it is a lifestyle. Are you modeling it?
Love for Christ to our fears. I agree with my mentor Ricky Temple who said that satan doesn't have to do much. Most of the time he just plants the seed and lets us do the rest. To that end I think that fear is our second worst enemy. Fear of being alone, or unwanted, of doing to much, or not enough. The list goes on and on until one day you realize you have talked yourself out of every great opportunity, simply because you were afraid.
But, a love out loud to Christ makes me think of when I was younger. There was a really dark and cold hallway downstairs in our house. Our family room (aka my playroom) was on the other side. It was one of my favorite rooms in the house, but of course in order to get to it I had to walk through this terrifying hallway. The light switch was on the other end near the playroom, so I had to walk through the darkness to get to both. I have always had an active imagination, so my mind was full of invisible creatures and spirits that might be lurking and waiting to attack. One day, I decided to try something to silence them, I stood at the edge of the hallway and spoke out loud to the darkness. It may sound silly, but it really helped, and the fact that it made me feel better gave me even more confidence. Now don't get me wrong I still walked pretty briskly down the hallway, but I wasn't paralyzed by my fear. That is what faith out loud does, it empowers you to walk through the darkest places knowing that you will never walk alone. God was with me in my hallway, and He will be with you in yours.
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